比爾因為媽媽帶回的僵尸病毒變成了僵尸小孩，但仍維持著一個平凡學生的形像，但他的遊戲水平卻突飛猛進……弗雷德·佩裡編著的《僵尸小孩日記(3暴走的老爸)》是一本讓你看了笑掉大牙的搞笑日記，一本讓你感受北美純正英語的輕松小說，榮登《紐約時報》暢銷書排行榜。

弗雷德·佩裡編著的《僵尸小孩日記(3暴走的老 爸)》是本繫列的第三分冊，比爾盡管變成了僵尸小 孩，但仍然維持著一個平凡學生的形像，他的成績保 持在中遊水平，日常表現平平淡淡，這時候比爾的爸 爸回來了，他處心積慮打著比爾和媽媽的壞主意。比 爾和媽媽又該如何保守自己變成僵尸的秘密呢？

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Here's how my escape went down! First, I scooted the chair next to my desk around, like I was moving around furniture. I had to make it sound like I was up to something dangerous. Then, when I heard Dad wake up and scream for me to keep it quiet, I stood on my desk and did a belly flop onto the floor face down, making sure I yelped on the way down! I've got to admit, taking that belly flop was a painfully awful idea. Even with my dulled-down zombie nerves, it hurt. In retro- spect, I could have just tossed something heavy on the floor to fake the sound of my impact. But, the next part was easy: playing dead! Not moving, not even breathing that much for a looooong time is something Morn discovered we could do. She uses that technique to pretend to be a tree. As silly as that sounds, the grackles in the backyard fall for that stunt every single time! That's how she got the meat for those "beak-fast" burritos! All I had to do was wait in complete and utter silence. After a while, the suspense got to Dad, and he opened the door to check on me. little did he know, with my butt facing the door, he was in just the fight position for my cannon--my BUTT cannon! All I needed was for him to take a step closer and get into range! Dad kicked my shoe hard, but that didn't matter. I knew he'd do that, and I kept playing 'possum! When I heard him swear, I knew I had fooled him into thinking I was hurt...maybe even DEAD! As he bent over to pick me up, he put his face just a foot away from nay rear end, which was fight where I wanted him. As I knew it wouldn't, my butt did NoT fail me! I mentioned before how my fart could be classified as a weapon of mass destruction, didn't I? Well, this time, Dad was the target, and he was utterly destroyed! As the wood panel floor vi- brated from the shockwave, I almost felt sorry for him...almost. When I turned to look at the results, I could see his limbs already deprived of strength, growing lifeless and limp. He stumbled back and splatted hard on the floor face up. Bullseye! I knew I had to work fast after that. The air was cleaner near the floor where he lay, and he'd be coming around again soon. So, I went for the trash where he threw nay notebook, then tried the door, but it was padlocked with a bicycle chain! Any other middle schooler would have been trapped like a rat...but not me! Espe- cially since I know how great my chompers work! With the door unlocked, I ran out of the apartment building as fast as my lethargic, slow zombie feet could carry me. From then on, it was a race against time! I hoped my gas would give me a big enough head start. Unfortunately, it didn't. Thanks to my turtle-slow running speed, Dad had plenty of time to wake up and figure out what hap- pened, he was furious once his head cleared, too. There's nothing a cheating sore loser like Dad hates more than being beaten despite all his cheating. I was two blocks away from home when I heard him running up behind me. I remember thinking I was done for. Even if I yelled for help, he could make it look like I was just being disobe- dient, especially if he took my notebook first! He could charm his way out of almost anything! The next thing I knew, I was being knocked over. "you little punk! you thought that was funny! ? hUh! ?" he raised his fist to hit me. Man, I hate bullies! P190-192